Global weekend

Aside from the fact that I'm in Tunisia, i had a very international weekend. Saturday night, after starting festivities at our house, the girls (ceyda, sarra, rim, senda and I) headed with Ceyda's Cameroonian friend to this club at some hotel downtown for 'Africa night.' I wasn't really sure what that meant, but it was exactly as the name implies. We were literally the only non-Africans at the event. And yes i know that Tunisia is in Africa, but Tunisians mainly use the the descriptor 'African' to refer to black Africans which is a topic for another post. So, it was awesome! The music was amazing, the people we met were great and so welcoming, the beer was cheap and everyone was dancing which is hard to find here. And yes, i know some of you are laughing at the thought of me dancing at Africa night and be assured that it was a funny sight. But it was a great change of pace and met some new people which is always sweet.
And Sunday. Our mutual friend Safia invited Isaac and I to her house for lunch. Didn't know who would be there, but it turned out that Safia knows the entire expat community in Tunis. We had Germans, Italians, a Senegalese guy, a Portuguese guy, a german-french-tunisian, us token Americans and a few others. It was SO great to be in such a setting (helped that some of the guys were quite attractive) and to share stories/advice about the business culture and life here in Tunisia. Isaac and I were the youngest by a few years (as usual), but it was great to meet other young expat professionals. And I talked for like an hour with Paco (the Senegalese) about how i wrote my senior thesis on Senegal and how badly i want to go there. And luckily for me, he confirmed a lot of the things that I wrote, but it was great to hear his perspective. I left very happy and with new numbers in my phone and plans for next weekend.

It is also hot again today which makes me happy. And tomorrow is Halloween and I am planning some silly things for my office.

AND THE RED SOX WON THE WORLD SERIES!!!!!!!!
(just sad i had to miss it)

Brr

Okay, so its not Wisconsin or even Boston weather, but it has been quite cold lately. Technically it has only been in the 50s or so, but brr i've been freezing. I think it feels worse because it has rained like every other day so it makes it a wet, chilled to the bone type of cold. I did not pack for this weather! And unfortunately its given me and everyone in my office the sniffles. Oh stop complaining Ali, at least you are not in Madison weather!

On another note- i went to another wedding on Friday. This was for a colleague of mine so it was less awkard and it was more traditional which was cool. The bride and groom sit up front on a mini stage on what look like thrones and sit and smile (or dont for the most part) and pose for the camera that is constantly on them and occasionally wave at newcomers or kiss those that come up to visit them. There was a band and singer and they were great- i was even convinced to dance a little although turned red as a tomato when i noticed a camera filming me.
The best part about the wedding was that there were finally attractive guys! It was one of the first times since i've been here when there were men in the same room that i was attracted to- not that there are no attractive men, but usually not my style. I fell in love from across the room with a guy in a purple tie, but alas it was not meant to be. I instead got stuck talking to a creepy guy with dandruff who reminded me of the creepy brother in Wedding Crashers and he told me he was an artist that wanted to paint my eyes. Between creepy artists and the plethora of 16-17 year old boys who attend highschool in my neighborhood and who constantly ask for my number or to take me to coffee (one told me he thought I was 17!), i'm doing really well here in the guy department. Oh well- probably good for me!

Stopped for lunch in Sousse on the way back and met with my friend Rim and her brother

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Originally uploaded by gilman.alison

Stopped for lunch in Sousse on the way back and met with my friend Rim and her brother because their family lives there

The Big mosque

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Originally uploaded by gilman.alison

Eid in Kairouan

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Originally uploaded by gilman.alison

Things have been hectic so apologies for the lack of blogging. In any case, last Thursday I took a two hour louage (mini bus thing) with my friend Bessem to go stay with his family in Kairouan (middle-ish TUnisia) for the religious holiday. Quite an experience.
The city is small, old and definitely more third world than Tunis, but still had a charm that I loved. It is also home to a large mosque that was the first mosque in Africa and the fourth in the world. The city also used to be the Muslim center of North Africa so the city has a lot of religious significance. Pictures above. I loved the medina which was older and less touristy than the one in Tunis, but didnt love the many tour buses outside of the big mosque.
Most interesting was my time (two nights) with Bessem's family because they definitely represent the 'traditional Tunisian family values' that I haven't really seen considering that Sarra's family is as liberal as mine. While there, I noticed that his mother (who was THE sweetest woman in the world) and his sister Ines (trying to get over a serious heartbreak) do everything from cooking to cleaning to moving shoes from one place to another while Bessem and his father watch tv. We all had an interesting discussion about this as it being 'just the way it has always been.' Bessem's mother kept trying to convince me to stay in Tunisia and marry her son (no romantic interest so no worries mom), but I told her that I couldn't marry a man that expects me to do all his dishes. He vehemently argued that he has no problem doing his own dishes, but I could see the hesitation in his eyes! But, it was quite an interesting glimpse into another type of family life.
Other interesting aspect was that his father HATES America and Americans. That was quite clear over the first night's delicious dinner as he grilled me about literally EVERY stereotype about America that exists. I tried my best to provide different perspectives, but it was difficult in French. Plus I was fighting a cold the first night so wasn't totally up to dealing with such heat and went to bed thinking that he hated me. Next morning- Bessem tells me that his dad was raving about me and blah blah good things about me. Surprised, I wasnt entirely sure if i believed him. BUt, his dad was really nice with me all day and we ended up having a 2 hour convo about American politics (he likes Hillary) and legal system. I might not have changed all his stereotypes, but at least now he knows an American that he likes and he knows not all Americans have no clue about the world.
We left Saturday morning with his mom crying and telling me that I have to come back. She also gave me a bag of homemade chili powder to give to my mom. I'm just loving the Tunisian hospitality! All in all, an extremely good learning experience and nice welcome into another Tunisian home.

Learnings to Conversions

This story is complicated, but i'll give it a shot. As I have previously mentioned, the colleague that I share an office with, Oussema, is a great guy and he loves to tell me about Islam. In the midst of telling me whatever new tidbit, he always asks, "are you interested in this?" to which i reply with an enthusiastic yes. And I am. I find the information fascinating and I'm very grateful that I share an office with someone as passionate about his religion and about sharing it as he is.
Needed parenthetical information: (One of the aspects I found most interesting was his explanation of how on one shoulder there is a good angel tallying up all the good things you do and on the other shoulder, there is a bad angel tallying up all the bad things you do. He likes to tell me that whenever I teach him a new English phrase, that my good stock goes up. This is all simplified, but bear with me.)
So, yesterday afternoon, Oussema and I were both working a little later than normal along with our colleague Borhene. Oussema puts on what i presume is religious Arabic music. I ask him about it and so begins another discussion leading to his explaining to me the various evidence in the Koran found with modern technology that proves that the Koran must be from the word of god. He then asks me, "Do you believe that the Koran is straight from god?"
Well! Now that is a delicate question! Personally, I consider myself to be religious, but i believe religion should be spiritual and felt from within. As for the question of religious texts- I believe in personal interpretations and that faith should be individual. I tried to answer diplomatically. I responded with a version of what i just wrote, but conceeded that the evidence he told me about could certainly mean that the Koran is from god. To which I was given- "so if you believe that the book is from god, then you must believe it when the Koran says that Mohammed is the true prophet and that Islam is the true religion."
My response: "Why Oussema, you're trying to convert me!" Which was returned with a sly smile and a shrug. (this was all friendly and jovial by the way) I responded by going into Borhene's office and proclaiming, "Oussema is trying to convert me! I know I did Ramadan for 3 days, but I never said that meant i was switching religions!"
Met with Borhene's, "Well it is good to question faith.. and you know that many Christians have converted to Islam..." I could only laugh and shake my head at the office conspiracy!

Side note: I repeat this story as merely a funny anecdote. Both coworkers are two of my favorites and are not by any means 'fundamentalists' or what have you and i am very grateful to both of them.
Side note2: I know i greatly simplified religious explanations, but hope I didn't screw up the basic points too much.
Side note3: I'm going to Kairaoun this weekend to celebrate Eid with Bessem and his family (and to finish my 'conversion') which I'm psyched about. The town is a historical center for the Muslim faith and I can't wait to see it and learn more- pics next week!

Feelings Shmeelings

So I had the privilege of chatting with Sara (my AIESEC successor) over the weekend and was told that i need to put more blog posts about how i'm feeling. I know i'm bad at that- but here's a summary:
I was thinking about this question on Sunday as I was walking around the Medina and well, I'm effing happy here right now. I thought I would really feel homesick at about this point in my adventures abroad (its been 3 months), but not really. I'm able to talk with my parents somewhat regularly since I have internet at home and yes, there are definitely many things and people that I really miss from home, but I've begun such an amazing life in Tunis that I don't have many reasons to be sad.
I fall more in love with Tunis everyday and I still have many other parts of Tunisia to visit (Kairaoun this weekend for Eid). I have solid and caring friends that have taken it upon themselves to show me what Tunisian culture is all about and I have been semi adopted into a family here and although they can never replace my family, they are a comfort. I am learning a lot about this culture and about Islam, but more importantly, I am learning a lot about myself. I am learning to be independent and to work through my frustrations and I am learning to deal with situations where I am uncomfortable. The language barrier can be an issue- especially when trying to be professional at work while having to ask people to repeat themselves and in taxis when trying to explain directions that I'm not even sure of myself.
Yes, there have been frustrations and times when I've been lonely and honestly, I wasn't really happy until the last few weeks. There are still some aspects that I am learning to cope with (certain social cultural norms that I find strange, a complete lack of romantic possibilities, the constant stares and comments in the streets), but by now I feel settled, i feel almost like I belong here. And most importantly, I feel safe here. It really is a safe country and I know that god forbid anything should happen to me, I have a strong network here that I could rely on.
So there ya have it folks- there are some of my inner thoughts and feelings about my life in Tunisia. I know it might all sound a bit corny or forced, but walla (i swear), its not. I really feel like i'm breathing easy now and getting to stop and really enjoy this new culture. And I can't wait to share my experiences here with people back home- I am SOOO excited for my parents to come here and see my life here and I know its not the Bahamas, but honestly, I think they'll love it. And I'm excited to go home for Christmas and cook Tunisian food for my friends and family. And most importantly, I'm excited and hopeful that other people will come here and do exchanges or even just to come and visit me (you know you want to). Will my feelings change at different times? Of course, but fortunately, as of now, I could not be happier with my decision to come here.

Weekend Updates

Once again, another fantastic weekend. Friday night, Ceyda, Bessem, Senda and I were invited over to Sarra's house to have dinner with her family. I feel incredibly lucky to have them- they have truly taken me as one of their own and I just feel so comfortable at their house. I even even filmed them for an AIESEC video I am doing! Dinner was delish and we all talked until midnight. Feels nice. Saturday, us girls had girls night full of food, giggling, wine and silly conversations. Another just comfortable and familiar evening with some good stories to keep in mind should we ever need to blackmail each other.
Sunday, I was woken up by Sarra telling me to 'wake up and get out of the bed because we are going to the Medina.' Well, I had not yet 'really' been to the Medina so I happily, although groggily, complied. Sarra and her mom and aunt (they are hilarious together) picked me up and I made a stop on the way. Sarra and her mother (who don't keep Ramadan) wanted coffee so we went to the one cafe that was open and what an experience! From the outside, it looked as if the restaurant was being renovated, but when I walked with them into a large room with the windows covered with newspapers, I was met with a hundred staring, male eyes wondering who on EARTH were these women entering their 'forbidden' haven especially who wondering where the blonde girl came from. HILARIOUS. Easily the smokiest room I've ever been in filled with men happily enjoying their vices. It would have been a rather frightening situation to walk into had I not been with two Tunisian women, but it was worth it- i definitely was laughing for like 20 mins after.
We then proceeded to the Medina and given that next weekend is Eid when all the children wear new outfits (our sort of equivalent to Christmas), traffic and parking was a bit of a nightmare which created some hilarious interactions between the Tunisians in the car. We finally found a spot in an area that I had not yet been to and I was amazed. The Tunis City Hall, the old mosques, the old government buildings and the ancient walls of the Medina all opened my eyes wide with amazement- it was all so beautiful! And I was sadly sans camera although I can always go back. We walked through the Medina and not too much was open because of prayer time, but we did manage to walk through a few stores and Sarra and I ended up buying matching 'hand of Fatma' (good luck symbol here) necklaces- yes i know i'm a dork. All in all, a nice autumn weekend in Tunis.

One of the nice things is that no matter where you go, girl talk remains the same. Cultural norms may be a bit different thus altering the advice given, but it is still good old fashioned girl talk. Gotta love it.

Dreams of Coke Light

Yesterday, I received an unexpected invitation to join the famous lawyer’s family (see pic of wedding) for iftar dinner. The wife, Attiat, even arranged for her brother to pick me up on the way to their house. It was a lovely, family fun evening. They have a beautiful home in Gammarth with a sweet pool and terrace (want to hit that up) and the family also includes a 14 year old daughter and a 16 year old son- both of which were eager to practice their already pretty good English. Also invited was their nephew and his American (surprise) wife and their 5 month old daughter. Apparently they met at an Arabic club on 8 Mile in Detroit- ahh the romance. How cool it was to have multiple generations and another American. The food was (as usual) amazing with the best brique I’ve had yet, a yummy seafood stew, chicken couscous and the best tajine I’ve had as well. I’ve really been spoiled this week and if I keep this up, no one will recognize me from home! Nice to have another family here that will take me under their wing if need be.
One amusing thing about Ramadan here, is that families (similar to the American stereotype) all watch tv during dinner and literally all of Tunisia watches the exact same sitcom that is on only during Ramadan. Some show about (from what I gather) a psychologist and his family and crazy brother and all his patients (girls of course) like him because he’s nice. It is sort of amusing in an extremely exaggerated overacting kinda way. Plus, after that show is the Tunisian version of Deal or No Deal where people of all backgrounds come on the show only to have their dreams dashed when they don’t win the big bucks. I find it amusing in the ridiculousness of it, but I’ve seen many a face brought to tears here over that show. Either way, I find it hilarious that everyone watches the EXACT same shows at the exact same time- least no one’s out of the loop at the water cooler the next day.
Fasting day 3: going fine except my body has never wanted diet coke or caffeine so badly. I have been tempted more than once to give it up and drown my sins with Coke Light. We’ll see if I last the week.

Too yummy

Last night, I went to my first real iftar meal (breaking the fast) at Bessem’s sister’s apartment. She is also young and had three other friends with her, but boy can she cook! It was by far one of the best meals I’ve had since I’ve been here. I invited them over for an ‘American meal’ sometime, but I am quite afraid to try and follow up that meal. Fasting during Ramadan is supposed to make people think of those that are poor and cannot afford food/drink and yet the iftar meals are quite the feast. A delicious tomato based soup, brique (the egg and tuna filled fried thing), stuff hot green peppers, a few different sauces with bread and this black soup like thing that has beef in it and is meant to dip the homemade bread in (tasted like mexican mole sauce) and of course little pastries for dessert with delicious Turkish coffee. Eating a meal like that after fasting certainly does make up for the day- both the hunger and the calories. Plus they were so hospitable and would not let me do anything even though I kept trying to discreetly clean dishes here and there. I think tonight might be burger night with Sarra- that is oddly the only thing I’ve been craving! And yes Ruke, I know I’m a wimp to only do Ramadan for the week- just not as tough as you and ChrisP I suppose.